This post is quite overdue as Danny and I purchased the Leaf back at the end of March, but we were just reunited with it last week after about six weeks (I was rear-ended) - so I am using that as my catalyst to write down my thoughts on the subject of "stuff" in general and perhaps our cars in particular.
In my 32 years plus, I have come to understand that I have a weird relationship with things in general, but that eccentricity particularly manifests itself when it comes to clothing, cars, and watch out if I have deemed something to be at all sentimental.
I had a short-lived fascination with the show, Tiny House Nation, which is capitalizing on the small house movement that appears to be sweeping across the country. I say short-lived because the show quickly began to feel redundant in that there are not very many different ways to show a family moving from a large house to a tiny house (typically under 400 square feet), and the inevitable purging of stuff that is required to make such a lifestyle shift. Plus, I found that I was beating up on myself because I do not think I could ever do it, and quite frankly I do not need a television show to be the reason I feel down on myself. I can do that all on my own, thank you; plus it goes against my pursuit for 100 Days of Happiness.
If you know me at all, or have read my blog, I think you know that once my brain starts down a path, God only knows where this thought process would land - as Danny has said, my mind is like a wide receiver running a route: zig zag, crossing pattern, over the middle, etc. So once I started thinking about moving in to a tiny house, and what all that would entail, I started to think about my feelings toward things overall. First this led me to my wardrobe - I have a fear of clothing. There I said it. Or perhaps it is that I have a fear of shopping for clothing. On more than one occasion I have come close to hyperventilating when I walk in to a mall or any store that sells clothing. I see all these fun pieces, but have no idea how in the world to make an ensemble. Then if I get something put together, I have trouble paying for it. Not that I don't make money, but rather I severely struggle with spending the money for this purpose. I do not know what an appropriate budget is for clothing in relation to my household income level. And then if I do pull the trigger, I invariably end up with buyer's remorse feeling as though I was consumptive, spending too much on myself, etc. Plus I just want to look cute and put together - because I figure that perhaps it will help me fake it until I can find the requirements make it. *Big Sigh*
Now, imagine what it is like to go car shopping with me! Let me repeat: I have a weird relationship with cars. Perhaps it is because I have had a string of strange things happen to my cars. Stick with me here: My first car (Chevy S-10 Pick-up Truck) was totaled while parked in front of my parents' house (as I slept through the whole thing). Its replacement was a Saturn S2 that had a tree fall on it, also while it was parked in front of my parents' house; somehow the car was fine. Shortly thereafter, however, the air conditioning compressor went out as I was driving to Michigan, which stranded me in Fort Wayne, Indiana. I paid to fix it only to drive it into a decorative rock (in Michigan, because apparently their rocks are pretty heavy), which did many dollars worth of damage. About a year after I got the car back I traded it in for my beloved Scion XA because I never did feel safe in the Saturn after getting stranded because of the air conditioning compressor. I provide this caveat because I understand that the rock incident was totally my fault, the car did nothing wrong. Anyway, after five years with my Scion, the car that brought me to Colorado, and one year before it was paid off, it drowned. No really, the car was flooded in front of my office. The fact that I was particularly traumatized after the flooding, combined with the fact that I wanted to feel safer driving in Colorado winters led me to purchase my first ever SUV and first brand new car - a Subaru Forester. I really liked the Forester, but I always seemed to suffer from buyer's remorse especially since the whole process of purchasing the car was particularly disastrous. Has anyone ever had a really good experience buying a car?
Are you still with me? If so, thank you. Last year we also had to replace Danny's car at which time we purchased a Toyota Prius. Besides the fact I called my Dad on the verge of a meltdown at the mere thought of buying a house AND a car in the same month, I have done just fine with that purchase. In fact, I have developed an attachment to the Prius akin to my Scion. Anyway, from time to time I would ask Danny whether we should consider trading in the Forester as it never felt like the right car for us, except on really crummy driving days, in which case I loved that thing! So I contacted a friend to get an appraisal on the value of the Forester. Based on the estimated value, it was finally the time to consider something else. About three days later, Danny and I end up at the Nissan dealership near our house as I come from a family of Sentra owners. So I wanted to consider a Sentra. Danny wanted to test drive the fully electric Nissan Leaf. Both of us loved it, much to our surprise. When the numbers came out to be pretty much equal, it felt like a real opportunity to utilize electric technology. Not to mention I thought it was funny to go from a 'Forest'er to a Leaf - get it? Yes, I am a dork.
I think you can officially call us 21st Century hippies - with an electric car and a hybrid. Just don't laugh too hard until you see our monthly gas bills...
So what in the world am I talking about? I think at times I feel pressure to have less things, to live a more simplified life. While this is a good goal, and one I am certainly trying to embrace: it needs to be done in a more personal way. There are just some things that I am not ready to get rid of or purchase right now. Still, I don't think that means I will not feel differently later. Just like many other things, this is an ongoing process. I am absolutely embracing the idea of spending money on experiences rather than things, especially when I travel. Yet, sometimes I like to have a memento to invoke the memories from that experience. They way I see it, this has to be all about a balance, and perhaps that is why I really resonated with an article from Real Simple, "What I Learned from Purging Most of my Stuff (and Why I Wish I Hadn't)." Sometimes, things do matter.
Now if someone can just teach me how to build a wardrobe, I would be eternally grateful.
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