One of the hardest aspects of maintaining a blog is deciding what is worth writing about (and publishing) versus fleeting thoughts that are probably best left in my head. With that in mind, I decided that I would use my first post of 2013 to share what I hope to let go of this year rather than talking about my resolutions. Although I did make a list of resolutions, two actually; I need to keep those for myself.
Shortly after the New Year's holiday, Danny and I attended the funeral for Jerry Kipp, the father of one of Danny's groomsmen, Matt. Matt and his family have been very good to Danny and me; so we wanted to be there to celebrate Jerry's life. As with the other special people we lost in 2012, he was much too young. The service was really quite moving, and truly captured Jerry's zest for life and Ford Model A cars. Jerry and others in his family are proud members of the Model A Club; a few of the cars are shown above - be sure to note the GPS in the Model A that Danny and I spotted en route to the funeral. When we saw this car, we knew we were going to the right place.
As 2012 came to a close in the Pechie apartment, at about 8:30 p.m. (yes, I was that lame); Danny and I both recognized it had been a hard but very good year. I would like to bring a positive outlook into this New Year, and with the help of a daily meditation book called The Language of Letting Go (thanks, Mom), I have to let go of some (read: a lot) junk that has been cluttering my thoughts and overall outlook for a while now. Here are a few (again, read: a lot) of examples...
- My editor for Her Game Life is the "Sheldon Cooper" (from Big Bang Theory) of the football writing world. For those of you who are not familiar with the show, you should watch it, but mainly this means my editor is very good at pointing out the problems (many, many problems) with my writing without finding one positive thing to say. While this has knocked my confidence for a loop, I have the whole Bears off-season to try to find it again.
- The professional anxiety and pandemonium of the last two plus years is dissipating significantly; it is okay to adjust to a new/better "normal."
- Some relationships are not yet ready (or may never be) what I had hoped for/expected them to be. I need to let go of these expectations and accept them for what they are in this moment.
- I am ready to say goodbye to this post-wedding weight that I have gained.
- Things that cause me to twitch and freak out probably do not bother Danny in the slightest. Gasp! He and I see things differently.
- With this upcoming birthday there will be no denying that I am in my 30s. At least most of this year I could say that I am just 30. In my head, this is a worthy distinction, but I will start acting accordingly, whatever that means
- After seeing the movie version of Les Mis, I do not dislike the musical as much as I had originally thought. While tickets to the play will remain the WORST birthday present I have ever received, I think I finally have a clue what the story is about. Plus I stayed awake all the way through the show for the first time.
- I will probably never teach [Social Studies] in a classroom setting again. I use this caveat because I teach 3rd grade Sunday School, and so I am not completely out of the teaching world. I am slowly (but surely) condensing materials that I have moved all across the country down to a small number of electronic files. I can only do one crate (subject) at a time because I always shed a few tears in the process. I like to tell myself that I am living a different dream by contributing to a ministry/mission that has been part of my life since I was eight years old. Now if I can just get a free-lance sports writing job on the side...
It is not easy living in my head, but I suppose someone's gotta do it. Thirteen days into 2013, I would saying I am doing pretty okay on my resolutions and only so-so on this whole "letting go" thing. Here's hoping that through acknowledgement, I can truly begin to let them go. There are so many other things that would be much more fun to dwell on, such as the fact that Jerry Angelo (the former Bears General Manager that I think is a complete yahoo) is in the process of interviewing for an open position with a new team. Or the fact that the Bears head coaching vacancy is still open, and I am not at all qualified for the position (bummer). Lastly, Duke lost their first game yesterday by falling apart in the second half to NC State; which means that Louisville will probably replace Duke for the top spot. Oh my, the possibilities are endless! My Dad likes to say that I look for things to worry about, and as usual he is right. Although I sure hope this paragraph of thoughts would not count since he also taught me to have a sense of humor.
An even better thought than all that nonsense; try to be more like Jerry Kipp with his calm demeanor, easy smile, and twinkle in his eye.
Now there is a good resolution for 2013, I am going to add that to my list!
