This is the third week in my "Going off the Path: Magazine Series" as inspired by The Happiness Project. In the last post, I alluded to this fantastic (read: ridiculous) find, Garden and Gun | Soul of the South which was found with both of us putting our backs to the racks and walking 15 or so steps before turning around and pointing at a magazine.
The third thing, I noticed about Garden & Gun (after the title and price) is the quality of the paper. It is large and heavy, made of paper that is not typical for magazines; which was intriguing to me. On a side note, I almost did not get past the first advertisement, a picture of Gisele Bündchen (fashion model and wife of Tom Brady) with a fierce look, wearing a backless shirt, oh and there is also a horse in the picture. It took me a good two minutes, at least, before I saw the horse because it is a black horse in the shadows. Sadly, I would bet my next paycheck that Danny never saw the horse... I digress. She is one of those "freakishly beautiful women" that makes me pause and doubt myself. Yet for the sake of my project I persevered. Turn the page, an ad for the "Next Generation Range Rover." Suddenly the heavy paper started to make sense. This magazine in all its 180 page glory is geared toward someone other than me both for content, but also socioeconomically. In case you doubt me, the third advertisement is for Rolex; and I have not even hit the table of contents yet!
Here's what I learned:
- There is a play called, Bloody, Bloody Andrew Jackson in which Benjamin Walker (Meryl Streep's son-in-law) portrays our 7th President as a moody, self-absorbed star clad in tight jeans. I wonder what he would do with Reagan or either Bush.
- Boykin Spaniels make excellent box turtle hunters. Apparently before a retired English teacher made this discovery researchers were having a hard time getting a read on turtle population numbers.
- I saw an advertisement with an IPhone and a picture of Asheville, North Carolina with the headline: Asheville's calling. Will you answer? I had to laugh at this because following my post on All About Beer, I was told I should take Danny to Asheville instead of Charlotte.
- I now have a recipe for a great hoecake, which apparently is much like their Northern cousin the johnnycake. For those who don't know what either is (me), they are nothing more than cornmeal, water, and usually some kind of leavening. This particular recipe is for a savory hoecake, but in my opinion if something has "cake" in the title it had better be sweet!
- I now know that there is a Missouri Taxidermy Institute, and one of its graduates (Becca Barnet, 25) makes unusual art one of which is a crow eating a piece of pie (called *wait for it* Eat Crow)!
- Libby Lane might be the only handbag designer in America who spends her free time driving cattle across the Texas plans. Might? I defy you to find another one. Her leather bags sure look nice though, and she will soon have a line of leather aprons. I honestly thought they were for cooking, yep I am not her target audience either.
- I will be investigating Bevolo, Gas & Electric Lights in New Orleans. I love the vintage look of their lanterns.
- Apparently Rooftop Gardens are all the rage among urban chefs. The Jefferson Hotel in Virginia now has bee colonies on its roof, which the chef intends to use in everything from honey butter to a honey-wheat beer made in partnership with a local brewery.
- I was quite intrigued by an interior designer who has a six-foot statue on top of his desk, presiding over the room.
- A North Carolina couple (also designers) turned an abandoned hospital into their home and studio. I especially enjoyed the tale of the attic, "We went up there with a flashlight. There were hundreds of dead pigeons. It was terrifying. Very Alfred Hitchcock." While I love Alfred Hitchcock, I am not sure I want to live any of his movies.
- There are times where words make me feel stupid. Here is a good example, I discovered that a pierogi (Polish dumpling); spelled pirogues is a small, mostly one person wooden boat that are narrow, flat-bottomed, and pointed as sharp as heron's bill on both ends.
While I sounded like a "negative-nelly" at the start of this post, I actually enjoyed this magazine as a one-time read. Not one I will subscribe to, but if nothing else it led to the creation of a whole new category unto itself...
Things I have never seen (and will probably never see again) in a magazine:
- "Everyt'ing changes. There's no dinosaurs running around these days, you know."
- A Beretta ad for hunting with supreme confidence.
- Rugged yet Refined (referring to a lawnmower)
- There is a song titled, "Polk Salad Annie," which was part of a story about a birthday party held at the House of Blues in New Orleans for an unnamed billionaire whose guest list included Bill Gates and a performance by Joe Walsh (of The Eagles), but no one was dancing. This writer was quite dismayed.
- Sometimes the greatest escapes are the ones closest to you - Arkansas.
My aunt tried to get me to go to Arkansas until I told her I wanted to see the Clinton Library. She then dropped the subject. - In May, 2013 there will be off-road and driving adventures for Land Rover owners.
- There is a Garden & Gun Club that includes everything from club shoots and fishing trips to field feasts and southern socials!
- The term, land yacht can be used to describe an Oldsmobile convertible
- "It stung as only stupid can."
- Arnold's Country Kitchen, a classic meat-and-three around the corner (in Nashville). I had to look that one up, "in the cuisine of the Southern United States, a meat and three restaurant is a restaurant in which the customer picks one meat from a daily selection of 3–6 choices and three side dishes from a list that may include up to a dozen other options." Thanks, Wikipedia.
- A can of beer can be used to measure weight. For instance, "he landed a 14 pound, 8 ounce bonefish in the Keys...just a can of beer away from the fly fishing record." So close, yet so far...
- "Man, we're going to need a horseshoe to fall out of our ass to get one today." Where has that expression been my whole life?
- Duck hunting can be elegant, at the Honey Brake Lodge. Sorry, my interest was lost when I saw the pictures of dead ducks.
- ...while two men draped in boa constrictors tout river tours and a monkey cavorts in the plaza.
- Then last, but most certainly not least...
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| Just because this made me laugh (hard). |
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